I live alone for most of my days, I don't have friends to go out with or talk to.
I know people but I don't consider them friends neither do I like talking to them
However the problem is that I kept contact with someone who was my best friend and is my ex boyfriend which is still love and he doesn't ..
I couldn't stay friends and I couldn't accept being treated like any other person in his life (I know I'm wrong but it happened)
We kept contact for so long but it was too painful I asked him to block me and he did..
I had his email so I sent him few emails and he ignores me
I don't blame him for it really, I would've done the same
I just don't know how to stop contacting him, even when I'm busy and focused on other stuff I still think about him and try to reach out it really sucks and it only pushed him away even further
I have no idea how can I stop embarassing myself and make myself even worse
I really don't know what to do anymore