hi! i found this website when i search on google "website anonymous" so here i'm. im not native english but i have story to share too. before that i read your article in here and i feel like im not alone. i feel like theres some people who feel same like me. i feel like i can truly understand what r u feel guys. so this is my story.i lost my virgin when i was freshman. thats bad in my country, because usually some people lose their virginity when their are married. i give my virgin to my ex and im thinking he's the only one. 'iknow it sound dumb' but hey i feel so falling in love with him. first time i met him i act like a jerk, im totally ignore him for a while and when i realize that he mean to mean to me at that moment im falling in love with him. i spend my time always with him. i buy something every time i think about him. its totally like i got witchcraft by him hahaha. after 8 month i feel hes change. hes always ignorant me and never treat me like usual.at my anniversary. 1 years omg! i cant believe our relationship is goin so far. i made him a mini album photo of us. so he can keep anyway and he can carry it. when i made it, im cry because im didnt find a store who sell the album cheaper than any store. so, i dont have any choice, i buy that album with all my money i have. 'thats kinda funny tho' so next day i give the album when im just with him in cafetaria. i said "happy anniversary, here's from me. i put all picture of us and i write a moment we had." he took the album, and put it on the pocket. he look at his watch and said "its time to us to practice, the coach maybe looking for us. so lets go to the field" he grab my hand and pulled me to hurry to the field with out saying anything.thats moment makes me thingking. did i do something wrong? we never fighting, i always care about him, i alway brough him a lunch every day, and i always ignore all the boys. and i realized that im not in his heart anymore. but i keep going with my feel cause i think i need affection from him. so here im 15 month with him in the night he text me. he said "i need to talk with u tomorrow." "suddenly i cried and i reply his text "i know what u want to said. i feel like u want to break up with me." "please let me talk to u tomorrow." he said. because i can wait to long for this hurt i ask him to said that night. and yes, im right he ask me to break up. i cant sleep, im crying very second and literally thats break my life. its not jus my hurt. and im crying for 3 month for him, because 1 month he left me, hes suddenly have a new girlfriend. like how he can do that so fast? thats break my hurt again. after 7 month i tried so hard to move on. he came back to me and said "hi" i respon him and the text suddenly became a long message. I replied to the message for friendly purposes, so that our relationship can be friends.guess what its not just a friend. he need more affection from me specially sex one. because i feel like i need that too so im doing that again with my ex. after 1 or 3 month doing that shit i realize that its wrong. i feel like im used. so im try to ignore him as much as possible. and then im free from him. 2 years im being single, and i met someone who i think can accept me who im. so im in relationship with him. after 3 month were watching movie and suddenly the situation is not control. im fall to the same hole. and i said everything to him that im not virgin anymore. hes so disappointed but he said " its oke, i love u because of u not because your past". oh guys who can fall with that word hahaha. and then 20 month we spend our together as a cute couple. and he prepare to collage. he didnt get some one who support him to the collage he want. but i said to him to never give up, cause u have me who always by your side, to cheers u up and if u in the down situation dont foget u have me and always have me i said when he cried because no one understand him. i can said that im the only one when he broke. when the admission announcement for majors, he said he got in guys, i cant believe it and im so proud of him, i post every social media i have about when he got into the collage and i told to all my friends about his get in to the collage. and he said thank you for being on his side. for a joke i said "dont forget about me, u will meet with a cute, pretty one girl on your collage. trust me and u will feel like u falling in love with her." why i know that? cause im go to the collage first before him. im 2 years older than him. he said "dont worry ur the one i love" and i said "We will see later". so, he doing his orientation. he met new people and his major hold events and the theme is haloween. he decide to show his perfomace. he want to show dance couple with the girl from another majors :) i said " i cant makes u to lose your moment in your life, being in center of the event. u can do it. but remember im still your girlfriend." "of couse baby. ill be professional." i always get news from him, what he do and everything. one day i told him to not drive her to her house because it so far. hes practice in his house why u need to drive her and back to your house again. just let her go with uber, she used to with uber tho. and he said "i cant. i promise with her boyfriend to take care of her."after that he change. he slow respon and alway ignorant me. i ask to show hes chat. and what i found is he cheat on me with that girl. when he practice, they are making out. thats broke my hurts. and i said we broke up. before that i call her and i told her "hey i broke up with my boyfriend. so what u want to do right now? u will take him to be your boyfriend right? and broke up with your boyfriend right now for him." and she said "idk. i cant do this right now." she said with yelling at me and honestly i said that with our yelling at her. after i call her like that with his phone. he drive me home. and we said were friends right now and keep up with that. im agree. i text her like this. "Sorry if I was like that, sorry if I was a child. I know this is the problem I am with him And I should take you. I just want to apologize, I don't want you to hate me, sorry I didn't think long and don't think about your feelings. Sorry, sorry." idk why i feel sorry hahahaha i think i dont mean to be mean to her. and she reply like this "I'm also sorry for what I've done with him. people always make mistakes, right? I admit that I was wrong and by God every time I was with him I always felt guilty at you. fellow girls, I understand how your position is now, also because of that I don't blame you for what you did yesterday. I know sorry from me today it didn't make you okay, but what else can I do?" "people always make mistakes, right?" this sentence is trigger me. like so you justify what you did?" i cant said anything i just reply her like this " It's okay, just a lesson for us. Because of you too, I know how he is. And if you guys are out, I'm not problem with that the important thing is I'm sorry about what I did yesterday. And I also don't hate or grudge you. Have a nice day. I just wanted to ask for clarity yesterday and actually chat with each other as a girl. What is certain is that I don't want to make the impression that I'm mean and i think just go with the flow." AND WHAT SHE REPLY?! "have a nice day too, thank u!" like ahahahahah :) ok. after that i still contact with him and ask him about how the progress with her. he said "she choice her boyfriend over than me." honestly im so happy with that new but im still sorry for him because he sad for like 2 weeks for her. NOT FOR ME HHAHAHA.yahhh thats the story of me. and anyway im going back with my ex who cheating on me. but he act like im nothing. should i let him go? or give him a change to treat me like i should to receive.