I wish you would talk to me again. I miss you a lot. You haven't said anything in a week. Are you doing alright? Do you miss me? Do you think of me? You said you wanted to be with me for the rest of your life. And for once in my life, I felt the same way about someone. No one else made me feel the way you made me feel when we talked about "our future". It hurts a lot that you're no longer in my life. I wish you would come back. Was having me around really that much more for you to handle? You never told me what you were struggling with. I thought we were open about that. I guess not? I told you some of my struggles. I know you've mentioned a few, but I always tried to make you feel better. Was I not enough help for you? Was I really too much? I missed the days when you used to make the effort to call me every night when you came home from work. Towards the end, those calls became less frequent. I guess I could have called myself, but I never knew when was a good time to call you. I wish I was with you in person. I know we would have been different. Now, I'm going on a trip with family to a place where you're not "too far" from. But I can't even tell you that because I don't know if you would care. I've never met you in person, but you got me so attached. You made me feel safe. You made me feel special. Told me I was precious. Told me I was "the one". But you're gone now. Just like that. I don't even really know why you're not talking to me. Are you trying to get over me? Are you with someone else now? Are you talking to someone else now? I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. No matter how hard I try, you always come up. I still look at the pictures you sent me. They make me smile. Make me laugh. Make me cry. I just wish you would talk to me again. But I know I should move on. I don't want to be the only one who wants to work for a relationship. I don't want to put in the work for two people in a relationship. Why can't you talk about it with me? Why can't we just talk about what is happening with us? I really thought you were different. "Some guys are scumbags". "Some guys play games". "I won't fight for love if you won't meet me halfway". "Is all I want too much to ask? Are my expectations far too high". I didn't think you were that kind of guy. Writing this is making me think of the future we used to joke about. Having "his and hers" cars. Kids with curly hair. How if we were to live together every night would be special. Me kissing you while saying "welcome home" when you come back from work. Getting the chances to mess with you as jokes and having a good laugh about it. Playing video games at night to relax for the day. Watching shows and movies together while cuddling. You teaching me how to take care of cars and how to work on them a bit. It all sounded so nice. So good. What I wanted. I didn't mind the thought of having you in my future. No other guy made me feel that way. Why did you have to go? I wish you would come back. I really wish we could talk. You haven't answered my questions in a week. I guess your actions answer it for me anyway. But for some reason, I'm still hoping, still wishing, that you would come back to me. And start something again. I still love you. But all this wishing and hoping when nothing happens is making me tired. I can't sleep well. I can't focus well. I am really tired of waiting. Hoping. Wishing. I still love you. But I'm getting tired. That love is fading. And I don't know if by the time I'm done hurting, done being tired, I don't know if I'll be willing to let you back in. I trusted you so much. You knew it took a while to for me to trust you. I don't know why you just went and ruined it. I wish I wasn't hurting so much over a guy I have never met in person...