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idk

k so i'm bisexual and i think my mom knows.... she's asked me a bunch of times and i've always said no since i'm not ready to come out yet. a while ago, she was checking my youtube history and saw a bunch of lgbt related videos and asked me then. and today, i was wearing rainbow earrings, and she pointed them out and asked me if they symbolize something. she's supportive, but for some reason i'm still scared and not ready to tell her. i also happen to have homophobic friends. they are nice and i didn't know that they were homophobic until i brought up the lgbt community in a conversation. what should i do? i don't really have any friends other than them so i would be alone. but its so hard always having to hide who you are around the people you love. worst thing is, i had a crush on one of those friends, and i still kind of do.