Hello to whoever is reading this. I really don't know for how long I have been having this giant secret of mine, but I guess it's about time that I actually tell it to someone. So bear with me while I explain whats so heavy on my chest for so long,alright?It's going to be long.I'm a young teenager, suffering thru highschool and is now in the end of it.. You would sit and ponder 'But how come could you feel trapped?' . It's because I don't really know what to do with my life. Working life (as of when i finish school this year) and Social life..Along with really small abuse from home.Don't get me wrong, both my parents love me dearly..It was my brother who was the problem (Thigs are far better now. My relationship with him is much more lovable and supporting ever since my brother got someone to watch for him). Things back then were scary. There was loud yelling and hell,sometimes it got really physical.. The worst times were the mornings. I had to stay quiet and not make a single sound due to my brother still being asleep (He was still asleep, because he was getting home by 5 am.). And if I didn't keep quiet, my brother would come in my room and just twist my wrists. Due to that, I am even able to make them pop.Anyway I will be completely honest, my social life is an utter mess, ever since 4th/5th grade. I always stutter and even get anxious having to talk to someone. Even family members. It's due to events that left me with trust issues (Many of my middle school classmates left me for someone else ((To be exact 6 of them which i all trusted with everything I had at the time). Along with the fact that they all hated my guts for no apparent reason) + I,myself, have ruined many friendships and relationships due to me just not knowing what to do or what to say to someone. As of now, Im in a somewhat better class, with brighter people..But I just can't seem to fit in with the rest of them. Yeah, they are good but there is another group of people who don't really like me because of me not talking much (Probably think that I think im better than them when its quite the opposite lol)There is another side to the upper part that I just talked about. I was also bullied, severly I believe. I'm talking gossiping, insults left and right, people taking my stuff and throwing it around the room by the same people I used to trust. Hell, once it got bad with me telling a joke to one of their friends, they waited for me outside of school and threatened me..Yes,I know I should have done something to make them stop..But I was just a small afraid child.. And due to all of what happened, I descided to cut all good ties with people that actually helped me back then..I still feel intense regret of doing that descision.Anyway, onto the reason I feel trapped.. It's just my parents are always asking of what I want to do with my life. I don't even know how to feel about life,let alone think of what I'm going to work with the rest of my life. I've always felt intense heavyness in my chest once we are talking about that. It makes me think of every single thing I listed up. I feel lost and confused and if I do try to reach out to someone, to let them help me in any way, I get shut out. They say I'm 'overreacting' or that 'There is no need to stress so much about it' . So I just descided that it's not really worth telling anyone how I really feel. The feeling is really hard to explain. It's like feeling dread, chest heavyness and you can even feel your heartbeat.. Then there is the unbearable headaches, jaw hurt and constant leg twitching.. I have recently told someone whom I love dearly what happened and he believes I have depression. I don't believe I actually am, but recently I have been thinking that there is just a slither of chance of me being depressed.. And here comes the question..By reading all of this, is it true?