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I'm not happy

I'm not happy! Im not sad , I'm discontent. Im upset, frustrated and feeling a lot of anxiety about it. I put out content , I do a bunch of things. At this point I feel like what is the point of doing anything. I'm disheartened. I loose friends because I'm not constantly doing what they want when they want. I'm youtubing my butt off and it's not enough. Ive applied to more than 1000 jobs during this pandemic and the 1 result I got is frontlines and they didn't realize it was out of the city. I cant let people know I'm not good with my situation. I'm expected to always listen like I'm a garbage bin but no one ever wants to listen to me. I'm fed up!! But no one cares.