I’m tired of living.
Im so tired of waking up everyday and feeling like shit, repeating the same routine I’ve had for almost a year.
I’m so fucking tired of crying endlessly for hours, I just want to stop feeling, stop living, stop everything. I truly see that nothing is worth it anymore, I’ll finish high school, go to university if I can, get a job and then work for the rest of my life. It’s pointless, we’re just repeating our same boring lives and I’m so sick. My parents hate me. My father screams at me almost all the time, we barely have actual conversations about anything other than school. My mother blames me for my mental state, telling me “stop making yourself feel like this” when I can’t help it. “You piece of shit, you always make me hate going out with you” “you can never have fun” “you’re not like who you used to be” “I miss the old you” “you convince yourself that you have the worst life” I know people got it way worse than me, but I seriously can’t help it anymore. Ive completely lost my appetite , I haven’t eaten anything other than a few spoonfuls of food in almost three days. I have no genuine friends, no online friends, no real life friends. I’m alone, and it sucks. I just want to be happy, for once I just want to smile, and truly appreciate life because it’s been fucking impossible for more than a year. To anyone who’s reading this, I’m sorry for wasting your time. If you have any advice for me go ahead, I don’t want to feel alone anymore, sorry again.