i used to be very happy. i. did the basic things like getting up early, working out, and finally being at a peace state. but recently, i've gotten so lethargic that i don't even want to wake up. crying has become something so normal in my life now, and i barely take care of myself. it's hard because i feel like i'm alone. i see how my dad is with my other siblings and it just makes me feel so insecure because what do they have that i don't? i don't feel like opening up to my mom because she told me to get over it, and i don't want it to be a burden to her or anyone else. i have a really special friend but i don't tell her how i feel because i don't want to make her feel overwhelmed because she has a lot going on as well. i just see a huge change in my way of living and my character.