i cant do this anymore . im so close to finishing this off soon . im going go distance myself and cut ties w everyone so i can go already . i hate being the one to leave those i love but its too hard now . its too much , i cant take it anymore . ive tried so hard to find stuff to keep me going even if became obsessed w it .. but nothing . nothing . and now its all lost . these will be my last final days . i hope they dont get hurt too much .