I recently had a baby. I love this child more then life, and couldn't picture my life without him. But I hate myself now. I hate the way I look and feel. I'm secretly dealing with ppd. I feel like a slob all the time. I'm out of shape, have stretch marks, and my boobs sag. I'm not worried about what others think, it's what I think. I'm tired, I want to work out, but I'm such a shell anymore I've become so lazy. Every day I dig my hole a little bit deeper. I tell my self to get up and do something but I just don't.