I'm in love with one of my closest friends. Have been for going on ten years now. They known since highschool and I've been trying to not make thing weird for ages, but recently I've fucked up. They have been in a relationship for a few years with their highschool sweetheart thus I never tried to pursue a relationship since my confession was followed quickly by a blind date their friend set up for them and they got together. So they have known I've been in love with them for what feels like forever. Recently I was invited to his online dnd group cause I've always had an intrest in being in one and they were looking for more players. I joined but I had to go over to his place cause I don't have good enough tech to play online comfortably while they do. So I'd go over and we would play dnd and its been super fun but after the session we would just hang out and drink together. This is where I fucked up. I've always had an undeniable attraction to him but I don't act because of rational thinking but this is one of the few times I've ever drank with him so I got too comfortable and touchy. We haven't had sex but it has escalated multiple times and I don't know how to stop this now habit I've built. I know this is an awful thing to do and its gone to texts as well but he's never said he didn't like it or was uncomfortable by it even when I try and express that I feel bad for doing these things to him. I don't know what to do and I'm terrified of ruining his relationship because I'm a stupid horny hopeless romantic but I also really like this dnd group and would hate to have to leave cause I fucked up my own life. I feel like I've some how manipulated him into thinking that what we are doing is okay but know its not. Even when I don't drink I end up still being affectionate with him. I'm scared and don't know what to do.