Kinda lost

Time Spent- 3m
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I was always a skeptic. i was never one to believe in things easily. Today wasn’t particularly life changing. But this past year definitely was. I learned who God was, I learned how God feels about me and I learned that my life needed to change. If you’re feeling tired, sad with no real reason behind it... It’s okay. I have been through it. I asked God to help me tho but I didn’t feel any better. I thought thats it he dosent exist... he dosent listen to me. But as I looked at my lifestyle I saw that there was no place for him to intervene. I made no effort to pray , read my bible, I saw God as a painkiller, not my father. Idk if this makes sense but im not fully sure of what life is anymore but im living through day by day praying and hoping it’s going to get better.