Looks will fade, but personality stays. That's what I was told. It seems good advice, but recently this phrase has really hit home for me, and I don't know what to do.
There's this girl, I've been friends with her for around 4 years now. She is a lesbian. I am bi. (Closeted to everyone but recently I came out to her and 1 very close friend only) .Anyways, I broke up with my boyfriend in very early 2021 and have been single since. I didn't exactly love my boyfriend but I desperately craved his attention and hugs. Now recently I have been feeling so single and desperate I have been thinking about making my lesbian friend my girlfriend. I think I have a pretty good chance with her. She thinks I am very pretty, she was saying how she loves hanging out with me and how comfortable she is around me and how I understand her etc. So there's definitely a chance she would say yes and become my girlfriend.
As for me, for the most part, I'd like to be her girlfriend, she treats me well. She is considerate, I feel safe with her. I like her personality. only.
The problem though, now I don't want to get attacked for saying this, I am not really meaning to come across as shallow, is her looks.
Hear me out, I KNOW looks are not the most important thing. My ex-boyfriend was not really "conventionally attractive" either. He was overweight, crooked smile, greasy hair, only wore hoodies/sweatpants, didn't smell great, didn't know how to shave. but his looks were not a COMPLETE detterent. I could live with them mostly. but this girl on the other hand-- I really just can't. Whenever I imagine myself kissing her in person, I feel sick. She just really isn't attractive and I feel bad because I know she can't do anything about it. It's not her fault and she has a nice personality to make up for it. but I can't help but think of what a perfect couple we would be if only she was a bit hotter. So what should I do?? should I suck up her personally unfavourable looks and have a girlfriend who treats me well, or should i stay single and sad and hope someone else comes along? please give me advice, guys! I'm begging you :( I super appreciate any replies !