I think I'm starting to lose a reason to for my existence. I'm not suicidal or anything, and I'm actually quite anxious about dying, but lately it hasn't really been scaring me that much. What I meant by the title is that I really have no motivation anymore; my school work and my chores aren't getting done and I'm losing interest in the activities I used to engage in. I know it's quite bold to say this at only 14 but I feel like I don't really have a place in this world, I guess. I have no interest in getting married in the future or even having a family. If anything the thought of commitment terrifies me, and I have never been able to get a significant other because of it. And I'm a gay trans male, so my very existence is hated by a lot of people. I feel like because of all of that I don't really have a place here. I'm very socially anxious and I am not good at literally anything so I don't see myself getting a worthy job. I have no interest in college, either. I'm wondering if I even deserve to keep living if I am not doing something good for either the world or my family/friends. The only real motivations I have to continue living are my parents/friends and my small fear of dying.