Love can show you the way but it can't always walk with you right by your side. Sometimes it needs to do so from afar, to keep the love untainted and pure. I know and believe this from experience.
Since my last great encounter with love I knew it would be a major struggle for me to allow myself to fall again, to open my heart again but I did. Even if it was only for a short while I did. I seen closed my heart out of fear and the repercussions of that started pilling up. Love tried to lead me, to hold me by the hand, to encourage me to look at myself and my past in other to let go and truly continue forward. I should have known better. I should have let love show me the way, be present from afar while I continued the journey with outside help. I should have gone to therapy, or something so they, as professionals would get tainted by my pain and not the love I was trying so hard to receive openly and give back in return.
I should have known better. I'm bitter from my past. I'm bitter about myself. My love is tainted and I don't know how to undo it. I don't know how to filter the dirt out, not in the time that I wish to anyway.