Takes a lot out of me to repeat over and over what I need and how I feel and seeing a change is great but when it fades after a week or so I’m just ready to go. He knows, I’m not happy yet the same issues arise with no resolve. Feeling trapped, alone and I’m wanting to start a family but I think I feel... I feel, empty. I know a baby won’t make things better and we’re already having issues because of fertility problems and here I am blabbing. The beginning of our relationship was ice. He cheated the entire time and after 4 days of marriage I found messages on his phone, photos on his phone and 4 years later I’m clearly not over it. I feel empty. I feel the cold running through my veins and I’m waiting to be engulfed in it.