Hey girl, just wanted to respond. Your title caught my eye,and being that my mom just passed back in July, I wanted to read what another had written on this one of a kind love. I wasnt prepared for what would follow as I continued.Im not gonna insult ya to even remotely know what your life has been like w/o a mom, but I can tell you as a parent and grandparent, kids often dont know the whole truth and its circumstances surrounding a parent being absent in their life.I was a hopeless alcoholic 78-95 missing out on most of my sons life which I dearly paid for, with him assuming I wanted nothing to do w/ him which was the furthest thing from the truth that ever was. We have a very "strained" relationship to this day and subsequently, keeps me from knowing the grandkids.I cant know your circumstances of course, but I can tell you from exp that even a crack whore addicted mother, who was my sons wife, left when the kids were very young and she's tried many times to re enter their live's, but the kids are so scarred from being abandoned, she'll likely have a "life sentence" as well. My son did one helluva job raising them and home schooling and they each work hard at the present jobs..I have to ask so please bear with me as I dont mean to be trite, or disbelieving in any way but do ya honestly know 100% for sure, personally, that she doesnt want you in her life now? My son thought he was the reason too , and Ive died a 1000 deaths knowing he believed that, and would gladly give my life , if all of that could be wiped clean...Ive never personally known any parent, who blames a child for their lack of parental involvement...Anyway, Im not a feminine figure BUT... my mom instilled ALOT of her motherly instinctual traits in ME over the yrs that Ive been able pay it fwd, especially since beginning a clean/sober/ depression FREE healthy life in 95. I post pretty regular on here imparting my personal exps and knowledge acquired with everything from depression to homeopathic(holistic approach) healing for such, teen hormonal imbalancing,peri menopausal symptoms,etc so If coming here has helped, feel free to share more. Ive been told that Im "kinda" LIKE a mother hen.(after everybody to take their vitamins/ supps...Stickin my nose where it's sometmes NOT wanted, but feel its "needed"..LOL., which my mom saved my skin many many many times over my 60yrs till her death. So if I can impart any of HER wisdom, I will certain try, if you find yourself in need, wanting some opinions on a matter / circumstance.. I think your a very brave young lady coming here and having this article mirror back at ya. I came here 3 months ago with MY article whining /pining over a girl , who friend zoned me..(YES.. even at MY age..LOL) and it was NOT easy writing about it, OR having it stare back at me..If ya can, try to get started on a daily intake of vitamin D3 (10,000 IU) thru these winter months having minimal sunlight.. VERY important...Im currently alittle slow gettin around and gotta have knee surgery JAN 11th and may be absent a couple days after, but I try to be here as much as possible..Again , if ya need to share more. Im listenin.