5 months ago
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My best friend and me

My guy best friend and I live really close by so we're ALWAYS at each other's house. I love him very much and he's an amazing person but I have a slight problem. When we became friends initially, I fell in love with him but he was in a relationship so I never told him about it. Eventually I got over him and after a year or so I told him and we laughed about it. His girlfriend was a little insecure about how close we were but she got over it once he explained to her that we're just friends and he doesn't have feelings for me. So neither of us had feelings for each other now but we still loved each other as best friends and spent so much time together and so became physically close. By 'physically close' I mean cuddling to some extent, sleeping next to each other, harmless things like that. Two years later, I started liking another guy and we started dating. But as soon as we started dating quarantine started. I haven't met this guy in four months because he lives a little far. Meanwhile my best friend and his girlfriend have met once. They're really serious about each other and want to get married etc. But for some reason when my best friend and I are cuddling he touches my butt? A lot. And I don't want him to stop so I don't say anything. So we've never acknowledged that this happens. We kind of ignore it and then when we're alone watching a movie or something he'll just do it and I'll let him. The thing is I think I'm still in love with him and I know he loves me as a friend but from his actions it seems like he's also physically attracted to me? So if he loves me and is physically attracted to me then it basically means being in love right? But he's so serious about his girlfriend. Meanwhile I love my boyfriend too but quarantine's just really distanced us so now I don't know if I'm in love with my best friend again, I just want physical contact, or quarantine is messing up my emotions. Disclaimer: my best friend and I haven't cheated on anyone!! No kissing or anything of the sort just a little butt touching which we've never even acknowledged.

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5 months ago

Re: My best friend and me

Kay woooooow.

first off you like the guy, that bf of yours needs to get the info you need to break it to him that you have feelings for someone you see more often but It’s a Pandemic so I wouldn’t tell him who it is but he does deserve the right to know how your feeling.

im asexual and I loooove when my guy friends give me physical contact but f their touching my ass? Girl chika honey, that is when my That crosses the platonic line —100% Iget that it seems your just being human or a teenager or whatever, but the pandemic and isolation in general is no true excuse been there & I feel you

Its Out of the ordinary and it seems kind of fucked up but the truth comes out and it seems like you care.

you prob want this not to be true but Ive got a hunch u care about him that way. you got to accept them feelings and you got to be smart af about it.

He is special to you for sure but he might not know how much he means to you and bc of his girlfriend ... you get to be his friend a little longer and keep things at a not so awkward level rite now, yay.

Iwould say don’t Change anything drastically but try to hint that you guys are close or you guys are always going to have each other as friends that kind of shit -ur my ride or die kind of shit.

sorry for the cursing 😅😬

Keep on crushing; let me tell you why:

My second best guyfriend and his girl were together for six years, he asked her to prom a semester early wanted to move to France bc she planned to study abroad and marry her after college and yet she broke up with him,

– and now he’s found out his childhood friend was the right girl for him.. [for context his name is nick and I respect him so much and love him dearly ^_^’ so true story]

AlwaysAlways always ALWAYS live like there’s you have a chance with the person you care about there’s always a chance.

i like to think if I love someone I want them to be there at my wedding whether it’s holding me and smiling at me as my new life partner, or to be in the first row as the best man or best woman smiling just the same.

(I'm bi l like guys and girls)

Look into his theoretical eyes and ask yourself if you want that, and don’t hold back keep him in your life and since he’s not single be there for him as though your still happy to support his strong relationship

I’ve read countless stories about couples that got together because the friend zoned one knew to wait and waited months or years until things came naturally for their lovers, heck The president had the same story and his First Lady was happy enough with him to have a 10yr+ marriage and two kids so yeah sometimes keeping it to yourself is the best thing to do I hope you guys keep going on strong as friends and that your love life is as comforting and uncomplicated as you wanted it to be <3


I mean it really seems that way. You liked him before and it looks like you never got over him. He may not have ever liked you though so I don’t think you can tell if he’s attracted to you just based on your occasional touching now. Are you sure he’s physically attracted to you and not just down to cuddle. Has he ever even told you that he’d date you Just-Are you even his type?

Hai. I think. Your friend here is kind of physically attracted to you. As a boy, I kind of feel that he is physically attracted to you. According to me, no boy would ever touch a girl's butt asexually, I might be little old school, but I can never touch my best friends butt just like that. As young boys, we do have our weird urges. It might be that he loves a lot like a friend ,yet kind of physically attracted to you. As long as girls don't show any sign of discomfort, boys think they like what they are doing. So if you don't want him physically attracted to you, just give him some signs , he should understand, if you like it and kind of want to be a friends with benefits , you guys can open up. Choice is urs.

Thank you for the replies!

Just a few details I glossed over while writing my post:

  • My boyfriend and I started dating like two days before quarantine started
  • The 'touching' was quite intentional and frequent not just occasional and I guess anyone who isn't us would assume we're dating based on our behaviour
  • I think I am still crushing on him