A few days ago, my dad was admitted to the hospital. He has some health issues so I was really worried and quickly called for an ambulance. This household consists of my dad, mom, bro and I. Everyone one of us works except for my dad because he obviously can’t work because of his health. So what dad usually does when he’s home is helps us do the laundry and really light chores stuff. So this is where the story actually starts. My brother works at night and does delivery/driving of goods and shits while mom works in a drink stall by herself during the day till night. It was the second day that my dad was in the hospital and it meant that the laundry was left undone for 2 days. I had planned to do the laundry that day at night when I come home from work. But that day, right before I was about to prepare and go to work, my brother had the audacity to say “Fuck! What? Am i the one that’s suppose to do the laundry? Why do I have to do it. I have no pants to wear. Why didn’t he washed it all. Don’t I need my sleep? I drove the whole night yknow?” That sentence of his and the tone of it really had me tilted. Like I felt that he was blaming my dad for being admitted to the hospital hence no one’s gonna do the laundry. If only you guys could hear exactly what he said. I literally just stomped right into the kitchen and said, “its ok, lemme do it ok! I don’t have to work alright? I’ll call my boss to fire me.” Like the only reason why I would say that its because he made it seem like he was only one working and like i do not have work? And take note before he said that he was freaking rude at my mom please! Like the tone and all. He even slammed the fridge’s door like bitch what?so technically i felt it was him who started it from the fridge door slamming shit. So I too got mad and started slamming things. He in return slammed even harder with his room door. He also mumbled something which I couldn’t hear properly then I walked to his room and asked him what’s his problem(After all these years i never imagined to have the guts to stand up against him). So yea, this is where argument got really heated from doing the laundry to talking about how he thinks I’m immature and doesn’t have a brain to think. Reason being that is because right after I graduate, I have been doing part time for good few years. Until i recently had my first official full time job(which I am lowkey proud of taking a step to committing to a job) and he apparently still think i work part time. Like it was dumb of him to not have gotten his facts right. Then i told him fyi i AM doing full time. He then say what do I actually contribute to this family, he says he pays for the wifi and that i use them. Ok fine, he wins for that one. But thats it. He also says, do i ever buy food and treat the family. Yea i do. Then he argues back saying how many time do you do that? You only do that when you feel like it. I’m like motherfucker said what? I do that out of goodwill to treat the family once in a while? How many times? Does it matter? I clean the house. And he say the same thing, you only do it when you feel like it. Motherfucker said what again? I do it during my off days. I get tired too working all day. And fyi, i work retail standing all day. I face challenging customers everyday. My job is pretty demanding sometimes. He drives and deliver all night. I’m not saying his job is easy but what drives me mad is that he isn’t understanding about people’s situation. He even said whats the point of you studying so much but you can’t get your life right and earn money. Like all he does is keep attacking me. I admit do admit i dun earn as much as him. Take note i also give my dad money but he doesn’t. So i think its fair to say i do still contribute to this family. I just think that he has this pride in him that he is always right and i am immature and selfish. Like I definitely have my flaws. But one thing about me is that i stand by my values and i have morals of never treating your elders like shit. My bro has beef with my dad because he thinks that dad is impulsive and also and heartless dad. But tbh all these years, my dad has been trying to prove himself but my bro is nvr satisfied. Like my bro himself has also donw a lot to hurt my parents in the past and i gotta say its really some dark shit and what gives him the right to keep attacking me? Suddenly im the bad guy? Sure i rely on my parents a lot. That is also because i want them to rely on me. I may not earn a lot of money but is that all that’s important? Financial stability is just one of the key factors. What important is that have a relationship with both my parents. And the fact that my mom was at the scene, it broke my heart that I couldn’t give her enough. And that i felt like at the end of the day, she would side with my brother maybe because she was afraid of him? I realised no matter what i do, i will nvr be enough. I was pretty mad at my mom. That night she kept calling me where I was. She said she brought me supper. I did not pick up. She seemed worried and kept leaving voice messages asking where i was. I messaged her i was outside but i was actually really near my house. I sat at the staircase of my apartment just listening to her voice message. I felt worthless. Like what gives me the right to go back to that home. I couldn’t let my parents live a good life. I don’t even know where I’m going in life. All i wanted to do was continue to livw my hardest. But that was no use and never good enough. Whether i do it or not, i am never enough.