Following my original post, i noticed people read the post more than others, so i decided to add a bit more. if you havent read the first post its down bellow in italics.
I cant get over him, its been months. before i sleep i imagine him beside me like he once was. I want to scream in the night, come back please ill do whatever for you. i would do anything for him to be with me again, but i cant control the fact that he lives away from me thousands of miles away.
But, when i think to myself in honesty, i know i dont love him. i know im in love with the idea of him. To have someone handsome validate your feelings and make you feel worthy is what im in love with. to have someone confident cheer you up and accept your flaws and not magnify them is what im in love with.
The next time you find yourself obsessing over someone, ask yourself why?
When we fall in love with someone, our brains completely turns a blind eye to all their flaws. Even if theyre manipulators, users, whatever, once the brain is in love, its hard to wake up to reality. So when you really think youre in love with someone who left you, know that he/she only satisfied some needs you had.
This experience was probably the best ive had in years. NSFW ahead, be careful.
A little background on me. Im a closeted bisexual male, and i come from the middle east. life was never easy, ive battled different wars both in real life and in my head. it never occured to me i would meet with a handsome young man whom i would enjoy my time with. i was in a foreign city, when i was on tinder looking for guys to chat with. I stumbled upon this profile of a guy, who was blonde, tall very handsome. Although i swiped right, he never did back. but i decided to send him a message on instagram. He didnt reply, until the next day. one thing lead to another, and the opportunity presented itself infront of me. i found myself in a room sleeping with this gorgeous guy. Its been months and i cant get over that night.
Sometimes i wonder what did he think of me, other times i wonder if ill meet someone like him again.