Time Spent- 5m 57s
16 Visitors

My friend essentially encouraged me to self harm for his own gain

As of right now, I'm 16 years old, I live in the uk and I've just gotten out of secondary school, ever since I was 14, I struggled with self harm like a lot of other people, I stopped after my 16th birthday but that's not important, the only way I wouldn't feel guilty about my self harming, was to laugh and joke around with it, thats what me and my so called 'friends' used to do, we made it a joke that whenever I would leave class, it would be to cut myself in the toilets and it sadly was, I laughed through the physical pain because the endorphins kicked in and I wouldn't care, my addiction got so bad at one point where I bought blades from someone who I thought was my friend, he knew I self harmed, hell he was the person who joked on about my self harming, he knew I couldn't buy any blades or anything to hurt myself so he said that he would sell me pencil sharpeners for £5, no friend does that, I didnt think anything much about it at the time, but if I had realised what I realise now, I probably would have ended it, so yeah my friend basically made money out of my self harming... weird isn't it? What people are willing to do just to make a few coins. I still get times when I think I should go back to self harming but the scars are unbearable to look at, it's sad that that's the only thing keeping me from slicing my thighs open, anyway thank you if you took time out of your day to read this, I hope no one had taken advantage of you like someone did to me :)