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My LGBT confession

I'm pansexual. My mom makes fun of people part of the LGBTQIA+ community not knowing that I'm part of it, she doesntmeanto disrespect us, she just isn't educated. I have a girlfriend aswell. I just wanna end it all :( I'm looking for help, can't find any. My bestie is so nice and excepting of me but I'm not really comfortable talking about it.