Hi. I thought I might as well write my story here.Im 14. I’ve known I was a trans man for 2 years now. I came out to my parents two or three days ago. They aren’t exactly lgbtq supportive, but also not homophobic, etc. When I told them I was transgender, well I only told my mother, she kind of freaked out. It’s not that she didn’t want me to be a male, she just didn’t even believe me. She kept asking me “why do you think that” and “you’re still a teenager how would you know”. My brother, who has small mental problems, told them he was a girl a few days before. He also told them it was just an idea, which now makes them think it’s A FUCKING IDEA. It’s really not, it’s a feeling I’ve been hiding for so long. I always knew I wasn’t a girl, at least not girl girl my parents thought I was. I like to wear pants, hoodies and anything to cover up my body and curves. I don’t understand why my mom didn’t believe me.Whenever someone calls me she/her, or by my name, which for foreigners isn’t particularly dragged to any gender, but it is in my country. Whenever somebody calls me that, it’s like I get stabbed. Through my chest. Through my heart. I just want to drown sometimes. I just wished I was born like a guy, so i didn’t have to deal with this shit. My parents also got me an assistant for school last year, he’s still here. He annoys me so. Much. Not that I hate him in person, I just hate that he is always there, trying to get my attention and make stuff worse than it is. Nobody knows about me, and they keep making it worse. I’ve told them many times, but they just don’t seem to understand. I’ve been into crime and death for about 9 months now. When my parents got the “assistant” it got worse, I started to match more murder and serial killer series and documentaries. They don’t seem to realize anything, my parents or people around me. I’ve actually thought about killing people, and to get my stress off things I’ve thought about writing it all out on paper, hoping no one will find it. Writing out full plans of who to murder, how, which materials I will need and even how to get ride of the body. Not that I would actually do it, I think...I also have dyslexia, but I guess nobody really found out because I never really misspelled letters a lot when I was younger. I literally can’t have my attention on reading, and I have to read things at least 10 times to “get it”. It’s annoying, and everybody thinks I’m just not doing my best, that I’m not trying hard enough. I’m happy that I can bury myself into the online community, hoping to never leave it. The only things which keep me from living right now are my pets, YouTube and stories other people write online that I can read. I mostly watch YouTube, like I watch The Dream SMP members on YouTube and twitch. It’s great, you just don’t have to think about real life. (I also draw, mostly fanart of Dream SMP members)Aslo, I’m obsessed with motorcycles. I just love them, and I’m already saving up money to get one when I turn 18. (You can only get them when you are 18 in my country) I really like sport bikes, and I’m saving up for a Yamaha yzf r125.Thats basically it.bye, I guess.