Whats the point in living. Why do i have to suffer everyday. Why am i so sad. Ive been through so much. Ive been molested and raped ive been hurt and abused. No one believed me. My grandma and grandpa said i was faking my mom didn’t believe me and tried getting back with him. I was scared. He tried hugging me and I screamed i had a flash back. Hed walk in the room and pull down his pants and make me do things. He wouldn’t leave until he was pleased. Id wake up with him there and his pants down. It happened for years i didnt know under I watched a show and I learned what it was i was hurt scared to tell anyone. Id cut and cry. My escape was music and sleeping. Now i cant even sleep because i have dreams. My mom was being abused I’d watch him choke my mom and punch her shes be bruised everywhere and i didnt know what to do i was 5 she would just sit there and let him hurt her. Finally she left and then id get beat shed hit me and kick me whole inwas laying on the ground begging her to stop. She would yell at me when i would cry and say ill give you a reason to cry when I already had a thousand reasons. My dad didn’t care about me he didn’t care that id cry shed tell me to be tuff ive never told him my moms ex husband did things to me. My dad doesn’t take care of me. He likes drugs better. My mom sells drugs for us to survive she cant ever keep a job. Shed go to mens houses and be in there for a long time leave us in the car and come out with money it was embarrassing. She always brings me down and calls me names. She hits me and kicks me she threatens to stab me or give me to my dad. My stepmom abused me and rubbed my face in tge carpet i had carpet burn on my face. They got a lawyer and they said i felt and i got carpet burn on my face. She takes things away from me when i act like i dont like her she just steals my shit. She would lock me in a closet all day until before my dad got off work and then shed let me out. I told my dad and he didn’t care my mom doesn’t ever listen she tells me to be quiet.
at this point i want to end it all