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Never Ending Pain

it's as if the pain never ends, the thing being you the pain is the only change. one moment it's my mother, the next it's my father, the next it's an aunt or an uncle and the worst of all a significant other or best friend. I don't see the point in life and I try, I try so hard to be positive, to want a life and a future, to want to have kids and all the rest but the truth is I just want it all to end. I'm tired of searching for comfort, care and love in the wrong arms. I'm always the one who gets the worst treatment or the last concern in everyone's life, no matter how hard I have tried to make sure they don't feel that way. I've been shut out 1 too many times or thrown away or completely ignored. my heart yearns and my soul cries and all I want is "my person" the one to understand me, never judge me, to always be there especially when I need them most. I hate these lonely sleepless nights waiting for someone to care or to hear that I am sobbing my heart out and I need a hug or for someone to rub my back or something but it never happens. I don't see the point in life, if you become successful, then what? if you become poor, then what? nothhiinng. it's the same old pain. I want to end me but I don't have the heart to hurt the others around me even though it's probably all pretense. I don't know. I'm lost. I'm hurt. 💔






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Re: Never Ending Pain

hugs to you 🤗🤗.......

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I feel the same way but I’m starting to realize that it’s not about what happens next it’s about those moments of joy and what we were doing during those moments. You have to look inside yourself and find your souls calling I’m starting to realize that mine is nurturing in the thing I do when I’m happy it’s taking care of animals and babies in my friends and giving them advice and when I feel at my worst even though I don’t care take care of myself taking care of others is what makes me happy look inside of yourself go outside more often and ask yourself what you like about certain things like nature whether it be the texture of the leaf or the color of the sky or the way the grass feels and start to ask yourself and reflect on some of the things you were doing when you were at your happiest and try and figure out what your soul is calling you towards and then work towards giving that to yourself.