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NEVER ENOUGH

I was never enough for them. Im trying to do everything that i can to provide their wants and needs yet a little reinforcement i can't even received. They hate me since i was a child and i know that since they always let me feel left out or needed and not wanted. I can't even tell them my burdens , they ask for my helo but i can't asked it from them. I know im ugly, slow witted and far from their expectations but at least i am trying, i am super trying my best. I hope you see that too. I'm tired, no. Im exhausted from everything. Listen please help me. I think I'll loose it soon. I don't evern cry anymore. I think im already numbed from all this pain. Can't even sleep at night. 3-4hrs of sleep i got. I hate it. Im depressed, please listen.