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No orgasm for me

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I've been with the same man for 27 years, since I was in high school. He never gets me off. Rarely goes down on me and when he does it's terrible and never results in an orgasm. Sex is for him, I never orgasm unless I do it. He says it's too difficult to get me off. It wouldn't be if he tried. Or cared. I want to know what it's like to be with a man who cares if I get pleasure from sex. I dont want to die never having had good sex. I've told him, he gets defensive and says it's me. Can you imagine living your whole life without ever having an orgasm someone else gave you?? I can. Its horrible and I cry often.

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