There is no point to my life. I haven’t had a job in a year and a half. My husband is in the military and I am far away from home. I’m an alcoholic and addicted to nicotine. Even before covid I rarely left the house. I have no friends, I essentially live as a hermit. We thought about having a baby, but we couldn’t stop drinking and I realized we’re not ready. For a couple weeks I was so excited and felt like I was working toward something, but it was all a fantasy. No one knows I exist anymore aside from my husband.