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One of the scariest things.

One of the scariest things is knowing you have to do something but actually getting to it...

When you find yourself standing in front of a door that you need to go through but it requires you letting go of the door you currently have open. You can't hold both handles at once and because of this you are terrified that the other door will no longer be there when you get back. Absolutely terrified.

It's all good to have gut feelings about things and believe with all your might that they hold truth but... There's always that 'but' that brings in fear.

I am scared of loosing you forever. That when I'm done with wherever this door takes me you won't be there to continue forward with me. Forward is all I want to go with you.


One of the hardest things is standing on the welcome mat of the door you want to knock on, the door you want to go through but just can't get your fingers

To knock.


I can't ask him to wait for me. All I can do is have faith that he'll be there out of his own will and determination.

If he chose not to I will not hate him or despise him. That would be his choice and I would respect that. I've stopped him before but this time would go against love and light.


#sigh...

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It's the risk you take by being alive. Fucking scary. But sometimes you just need to close your eyes, jump and hope there's a soft landing. Being comfortable with their life never made anyone exceptional.


Sucks that I need to add more text just bc 300 characters. I dropped the mike up there and now I'm forced to explain it. #sigh.