I've always felt like an outcast. But I've never known why. I have a small group of friends I like to hang out with at school, but because of the pandemic I can't see them anymore. We've set up a group chat on a social media site yet whenever I want to talk, no one responds, if they do it's clearly out of pity.I don't take part in competitive activities because they make me feel worse.Even before all of this everyone avoided me. Sometimes people interrupt my conversations like I don't even exist. My ex's friend told me I was a nobody and never to talk to him again. Is it because I'm a teacher's pet? Maybe. All I want is to be respected by authority though.Is it because I have nothing in common with others? Probably not. That shouldn't matter... right?Is it because I make so many "mistakes"? I hope not. But it's the best I've got. So everyone hates me because I'm a retard. That makes sense.I don't want to fall into this state of anxiety where I believe everyone hates me. But I'm already sitting on the edge of that cliff, so I might as well.I've already got so many problems and I don't want this to be another.Please, give me some sort of hope."I'm sorry."