i wanna go back to the days that i dont give a fuck about numbers and simply wanna express myself. i have big dreams and a competitive spirit not just in academics but i wanna be known too and be versatile in many aspects. it started when my edit or video got 1,000 views and I got online friends. I wanted more, my expectations became more idealistic and it fucking tires me out if i do smth with effort again but did not get the results that im expecting. life just slapped me on my face, i have to face that we’re having financial problems and i have to work harder like find ways to get money as a child. its fine with me actually but the thing is my home is toxic especially my parents so it would also tire me seeing them making myself endure all the fucking pain. i just wanna do the things i dream but they would just be there to block. any advice?