Time Spent- 41m
13 Visitors

Quite long.

I don't have anyone to talk to, so I guess I'll be writing here. So, a little while back, I meet with a male friend which I haven't seen for long (we occasionally communicate via text and call). I was hesitant at first, because I'm afraid it will be awkward. I like him as friend, I never allowed myself to want to think of him as more than that becuz I don't want to lose him (just being friend is enough). So, back to the story, we finally met, and he is such a gentlemen, no flirting (not that I expecting), but he did make me feel special (I guess I shouldn't feel special, lol)


After our meet, he call me when he's celebrating his brother b'day (he went back home to his hometown) , and he said that his relatives is pressuring him for a girlfriend, and so he just need an excuse to run away from them for a while, and so he call me. He joke, that he'll tell them he is dating the immigrant at his workplace, and I add I'm the immigrant, just pass them the phone if they want to talk to me. (🤦).


Fast forward, we did chat a lot after that for a while, but now, nothing. I try to contact(text) him again, but he sometimes didn't reply on it. Or took a very long time to respond. I regret meeting him at the first place because somehow I think within that short period of time with him, I think I've fall for him. I know I shouldn't. (That's what I'm trying to avoid all this time).


So, yesterday I texted him again, to ask about his day, and to ask him to take care and be cautious of the virus (late respond again), and I decide that maybe it will be the last time for me to contact him first. I mean he didn't do anything wrong (so I don't have the right to be upset with him), I'm the one who shouldn't expect anything more.( I always overthinking stuff, and I tot maybe he's disgusted by me during our meet, and maybe he sensed that Im starting to like him, and so, he is distancing himself. Sometimes when I'm being positive, I just think that maybe he have a gf now, and so the change (I prefer this tot))


I'm not sure you guys who are reading this understand what I'm writing about (I'm not good at telling story, lol, and English is not my first language) but i just want and need to let this thing off my chest, hence I'm writing here. I shouldn't meet him the other day, none of this would happen, and we will still be communicating normally. Thanks for reading. I think I feel a lot better now. Things will get better once I stop expecting. Back to normal then. Hope I'll forget about this asap.