20 days ago
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sad jazz

Alright, so I’ve fucked up my life really bad and I’m not sure where to go from here.


Around the October-December months of the year, I always get really bad… I don’t want to say depression, because I’m not diagnosed and it feels wrong to say it if I’m not, but it sure as hell feels like it. COVID didn’t do anything to help that.


Long story short: I sort of fell out of contact with everybody important. I don’t have the social energy to deal with people or their messages or the mental/physical/whatever energy to do anything. And if I’m not forced to do something (which I wasn’t)— well, I’d just sort of lie in bed all day feeling shitty. And this sounds bad enough, but like… ‘fell out of touch with everybody important’ also includes things. Like my schoolwork, and my college applications (which are due this year, ha).


For context (not to brag— sorry if it comes off that way): I’ve always been a straight-A student. But I haven’t turned in crap since like… October, and I missed all the deadlines for the colleges I wanted to apply to. It’s just… not great. I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know if this website allows replies, but if it does, advice would be appreciated.


Otherwise, well, thank you for taking the time to read this. I’ll… well, I guess I have to carry on, yeah? I just have to learn to pick up the pieces first :/





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20 days ago

Re: sad jazz

Dear Sad jazz. Do NOT be hard on yourself. You have NOT fucked up your life. Sounds to me that you may have some form of mental illness or vulnerability that comes to strength at this time of year. You are not alone. You may have family members or grandparents etc who suffer this because often it’s heredetary. They may well not discuss this out of misplaced embarrassment. You must talk to your nearest and dearest. This is very hard to do. You MUST go and see you doctor and get some professional advice. Dig in. Don’t give in. Good luck.


Dude you need to get you're shit together I had to drop a year cuz I was lazy not to fill college forms. If it's something else if you don't feel like going to college this year that's fine take a year off clear your mind.

About contact well they probably are doing the same thing it's covid all of us students are lazing around we're just lying eating watching Netflix and getting fat that's it.

If you still have some time fill you're college forms and do your homework.


I know it's hard to stay motivated and you feel like doing nothing and you're so bored no energy at all even though you're not doing anything and at the end of the day you feel like crap cuz you haven't done anything and you know you have to study but you're not.


So right now I think studying not much but I am so what I did I started with giving few minutes every day yes minutes not even hours or even half so you do the same even it's 5 minutes open you're book just look at the syllabus then start doing things you like first let it be 5-10 minutes slowly slowly increase you're time make it a habit of studying everyday you'll be fine. You sound like a smart kid you'll be fine.

Ohh about friend those who are gonna stay will stay and those who won't they won't not many high school friend stay friends chill you'll make new friends you'll have old friends. After few years you guys will be laughing about it.


this website do allow replies :)

not gonna lie, the only reason I chose to reply is because I feel the same. I'm 18 (female) and I'm in college right now so after my highschool, I lost contact with all my friends. honestly I kinda let it happen. i didn't want to continue friendships anymore. and now when i think about the entire situation, I realise that at some point I also lost the interest to study but now I got to get back with my life and start from scratch because I really don't deal with failures well when I know that (also not to brag - sorry if it sounds like that) I am also a straight A student and have been good at whatever I do. So yeah, it's frightening to think that I have to start all over again but that's better than lazing around. it takes courage of course. So I advise you to do the same. Also, I would love to talk to you more if you are down for that