Alright, so I’ve fucked up my life really bad and I’m not sure where to go from here.
Around the October-December months of the year, I always get really bad… I don’t want to say depression, because I’m not diagnosed and it feels wrong to say it if I’m not, but it sure as hell feels like it. COVID didn’t do anything to help that.
Long story short: I sort of fell out of contact with everybody important. I don’t have the social energy to deal with people or their messages or the mental/physical/whatever energy to do anything. And if I’m not forced to do something (which I wasn’t)— well, I’d just sort of lie in bed all day feeling shitty. And this sounds bad enough, but like… ‘fell out of touch with everybody important’ also includes things. Like my schoolwork, and my college applications (which are due this year, ha).
For context (not to brag— sorry if it comes off that way): I’ve always been a straight-A student. But I haven’t turned in crap since like… October, and I missed all the deadlines for the colleges I wanted to apply to. It’s just… not great. I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know if this website allows replies, but if it does, advice would be appreciated.
Otherwise, well, thank you for taking the time to read this. I’ll… well, I guess I have to carry on, yeah? I just have to learn to pick up the pieces first :/