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Sad thoughts that I have

When I was about 12 years old (I am now 20) I talked a 9 year old girl family friend of mine into giving me a few kisses. That is as far as I have ever gone in regards to this problem, I didn't take it any further. I have felt very guilty about this over the past few years and I am trying to find a place where I can get this burden off my chest and hear what people have to say to me. It is a thought about my childhood that has scared me for a while as I am wondering if there is possibly something wrong with me. I want to find places where I can help other people with this problem or help people who have gone through any sexual abuse. If anyone knows a good place for me to start that would be very great.

I wish I could forget about these thoughts I have been having but it is quite hard. Some days are better than others. I have very dark days where I feel down. I just want to be able to talk to someone about this.

Thank you for reading

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Re: Sad thoughts that I have

I have read your post several times, and I just don't understand why you feel so guilty.

You were 12. She was 9.

You kissed a couple of times.

What's the harm?

Am I missing something?

Were you tongue-kissing a 9 year old? Is that why you feel guilty?

Or were you touching her sexually while you were kissing her?

It sounds to me like you were both kids having a normal childhood sexual experience.

Heck, I bet that girl isn't anywhere near as bothered about this as you are. In fact, this probably was a positive experience for her.

I know this may sound like a worst advise ever, but if you are still in contact with that girl, why dont you apologize for it and see how she responds to it, maybe for her it was just a first kiss, I was sexually abused when I was 6, I am 18 now, and if I could talk to that person and ask why he did it, I would, I know my case isn't related to yours, but it was a kiss, and unless you dont know how she felt about it, you cant come up with a different conclusion.