It's not confession per say but it's something really weird. It seems that if I give time it will feel okay but it arises again. My father is an okay person. He's a bit old and we will always have a generation gap but it feels that I keep hiding this fact or feeling. I feel like punching them both. And no no sexual feelings are involved here. Whatever they do they will still be the angry and grumpy and non understanding parents and they have both hit me(this is maybe common but it is unacceptable anyways). My bday was 2 days ago and they got me a cake and everything and it was grateful and I was so ecstatic. And it all is ruined because of something they did in past. My bf's father was way harsher and way worse and he found him searching for child porn and yet he forgave him and I feel weird that they didn't even do anything of this sort and yet I'm holding some grudge against them.Maybe it is the fact that I'll tell them in future about my bf and it will be something serious like getting kicked out of the family(which I think is better in some sense but I do need money first). But for far as I'm concerned, I just wanna punch them and get it over with. I got reminded of this again because he shouted at me because we were arguing over a broken mug which broke because I had put it on an unstable side of table and I feel scared of him. I still feel like a scared kid hiding in her room or something. In the end I wanna feel happy for them and not have anger cloud the parental love.