I have been through quite a lot in the last year. My wife and I are getting a divorce, and it has not been very civil. Unfortunately, I had met someone and so my soon to be ex-wife is naturally very very upset with me. Additionally, the woman who I am in a relationship with, was still finalizing her divorce, but not completely finished with it. And so her ex-husband has been stocking us, harassing, threatening, everything. He even forced my boss to transfer me to a different site, even though I’m quite sure that was completely illegal. And he STILL will not stop. So now I am just trying to move forward, but there are forces against me. I feel tremendous shame, but I am trying so hard to bring joy back into my life. I lived a loveless marriage for over 10 years. We basically were just running a business of having a child. Eventually I knew that it was not the right model of love to show my kid, so I ended it. And it got very ugly after that. This volatile ex-husband is still at it. He still sends extremely threatening texts to his ex-wife, and he threatens to approach my daughter at some point and tell her about what a bad person I am. Meanwhile, I am a civil servant, a public school teacher of 20 years. The community that I work with adores me and knows I am a great person. But I am also a public figure, and he is trying desperately to tarnish my reputation.I have filled out a restraining order, but it seems that it could only make it worse. He is emotionally immature, and takes anything that is said and negates it, throws it against the wall, dismisses it. Even logic. So it’s very hard to negotiate with him, or express true feelings. He’s got a lot of Irish stubborn in him. I understand that it wasn’t the right time, but it’s really bad. I know I did something wrong. I met someone back When I was not divorced. I will never forgive myself for that, even though I know that life takes unexpected turns, and love doesn’t always happen on that perfect day and time. I guess I am contacting you, because I am seeking a greater sense of self forgiveness. I need to know that I can move forward without carrying all of this shame in my heart. Because my ultimate task was love and joy. And to be able to have that to show my growing teenage daughter. Rather than the scenario she was in, with two parents that fight often. And even when we are not fighting, our tone of voice is or hardly loving. That’s not what I want her to grow up thinking a good marriage is. Thank you for getting back to me sometime. I was raised Roman Catholic, and attended church weekly in my youth. I also did CCD classes, and even had a priest as a therapist after my father died when I was young. But I have not been much of a religious man since my father commit suicide when I was 10. Someone told me that he never went to heaven according to Catholic beliefs, and because that was too hard for me to accept , I rejected the religion all together.but this doesn’t mean that I’m not spiritual, and that I can’t pray, or that I don’t think about God, or divine intervention. I am starting to feel like that may be my saving grace.Let me know if you can help