I've always said growing up my life is like a shitty soap opera. Every day there was some new completely predictable twist because with extreme instability comes predictability that your life will continue to be unstable. I knew no matter what we would never stay in one place. That the second I felt better again something would happen to make me feel even worse than before. Even now when I am stable and what most people would call happy I am waiting for the other shoe to drop. When I hear a loud voice I think my dad is yelling or when he coughs for too long like when you get a scratchy throat I think he's dying. It's like nothing can be just calm and normal. Now back to the soap opera thing just to prove my point, my grandfather lied about having cancer. My aunt accepts meth and coke as payment for rent from her tenants. My other aunt got shot during a drug deal and here I am. This girl who at first glance you would assume has everything in life whos kind and pure and then you peel back the layers and you're like what the hell man. There's so much more I could say but yea.