The worst feeling in this world is feeling like a loser.
When you have everything but at the same time nothing.
Sometimes something good leads you to hell.
On 16 april 2016 when went to my new class after scoring the highest in maths and science i took pcm in my senior secondary school. Was really happy because at that time i had dreams ambitions which now all has been destroyed by me very successfully. In my first class which was a chemistry class i didn't get what the hell was that molecular structure stoichiometry and all that shit everyone was solving and i was the only one looking here and there then my best friend left pcm and went to arts n i was like nahhhhh I'm not going to quit this fast because i was a really confident strong and intelligent girl which I'm not now. Thn i studied failed studied failed again and again my dad was paying alot on my education from the start hell lot of money he has wasted on me and still doing. Now on 4 September 2020 i had made my way to the 2nd year of engineering in a private college with very high fees structure all this because of my attitude nahh I'm not going to quit but from that day to now i have failed I'm useless i do love myself but following this profession isn't making me happy n idk how tf that job will make me happy I've tried alot but i can't reach that level. And now i have to finish my graduation and disappoint my family and my loved ones as always this feeling has became so normal that idk where to go what to do but suicide which also I'm not gonna do because nahhhhhh I'm not gonna quit but all i want to say I've lost a very talented girl inside me in these years so please whosoever is reading this please quit if that 1 sec of that thing doesn't matches your soul doesn't make you happy quit and go for improving yourself in other better ways. Not always difficult roads are worth it sometimes your ability is soo good that the easy road will take you where you were always dreaming of before it's too late.