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Sometimes it's good to quit

The worst feeling in this world is feeling like a loser.

When you have everything but at the same time nothing.

Sometimes something good leads you to hell.

On 16 april 2016 when went to my new class after scoring the highest in maths and science i took pcm in my senior secondary school. Was really happy because at that time i had dreams ambitions which now all has been destroyed by me very successfully. In my first class which was a chemistry class i didn't get what the hell was that molecular structure stoichiometry and all that shit everyone was solving and i was the only one looking here and there then my best friend left pcm and went to arts n i was like nahhhhh I'm not going to quit this fast because i was a really confident strong and intelligent girl which I'm not now. Thn i studied failed studied failed again and again my dad was paying alot on my education from the start hell lot of money he has wasted on me and still doing. Now on 4 September 2020 i had made my way to the 2nd year of engineering in a private college with very high fees structure all this because of my attitude nahh I'm not going to quit but from that day to now i have failed I'm useless i do love myself but following this profession isn't making me happy n idk how tf that job will make me happy I've tried alot but i can't reach that level. And now i have to finish my graduation and disappoint my family and my loved ones as always this feeling has became so normal that idk where to go what to do but suicide which also I'm not gonna do because nahhhhhh I'm not gonna quit but all i want to say I've lost a very talented girl inside me in these years so please whosoever is reading this please quit if that 1 sec of that thing doesn't matches your soul doesn't make you happy quit and go for improving yourself in other better ways. Not always difficult roads are worth it sometimes your ability is soo good that the easy road will take you where you were always dreaming of before it's too late.

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Re: Sometimes it's good to quit

Everybody wanted me to do something. I’d been raised to be a Ranger. Oh keep playing sports. Be a fullback at some big school; go knock homers in the minors. Oh you should be an artist. I was offered full scholarships in math; engineering; art.

I started drawing blue prints in high school. Built crap for space. Hated every minute of it.

I wanted to be a history teacher. That was my dream. And to teach art on the side. I wanted to be in the Guard; but not be a Ranger.

I took some art in college. Offer full ride to take it or be an actor. But I chased the money. I was told be a professor. I taught Physics two semesters. Only goobers like me understand that stuff. I wanted to teach history.

But I let everyone else decide what I did. Chase the money. I also wanted to write books. But as you can tell grammar was the one thing I was horrible at.

I got sick; eventually disabled. Lost the job; retirement; investments; German cars. Wife divorced me; she got the kids, I gave her the house. Penthouse to outhouse LOL.

When we married I had to pay my wife’s college. She wanted to be an engineer. She sucked at it. I made her taking something she’s great at. She has good job; but at divorce she said I stole her dream. She failed four straight semesters in engineering. Graduated with honors in the other major.

Now for some humor. I’m very attractive & endowed. That’s the thing I’m best at in world. Women would say you should be a porn star. No way. But at least I’d had money. Just kidding. No way would I have done that. But we all come here because we are sad.

I think my ex-wife is going to die. She’s so tiny & weak. I just spent all I had for experimental treatment. I have an autistic child who almost died from seizures recently. They both got upset & it led to this after she divorced me. I got so upset; & weird infection. Now I think I have about a yr left.

I have two younger kids too. I came here weeks ago to unload my sins & prepare for death after nearly dying twice recently. But my heart breaks for so many in pain; so I’m trying to show them life is worth fighting for instead. God Bless