Ive gone my whole life doing everything I cpild to treat people equally and consider everyone the same. But where I live and where I stayed prior, ive started noticing some things. And now the N word has become a daily thing in my mind. Several times a day. I see myself imagining some dark stuff, filled with absolute hate. This isnt like me. I dont want to become that person but double blind statistics in my area keeps pushing me in that direction.