My Boyfriend and I broke up two weeks ago this Sunday and it hurts for many different reasons, obvious and not very. He said he has been feeling drained which is why things seemed hard, that he can't fully commit himself to me because of his last two very toxic and emotionally abusive relationships. I actually saw him go through both of these and tried my best to help at the time, so I completely understand it.I reassured him that I fully understand why he feels this way, that he can't be in a relationship right now and wants to live his single life for a while, as much as it hurts to actually let him go. He told me then that there were no changed feelings, that he still loves me and we're best friends, that he doesn't want us to just fall apart and I agreed But then he went on saying that he just wasn't sure how long he wouldn't be ready for a relationship, and worried that he wouldn't know how he felt at that time he did, so he told me "I don't want you to feel like you have to wait or pass up anything that comes to you, it isn't fair to you" since he's unsure if we'll ever be together again and also unsure on just how long he could feel like this (2 years was the last time this happened)I told him I'm not gonna move on, that he's worth waiting for because I feel so sure about him and love him too much just to let him go after a very short 2/3 months together that were some of my happiest times. He didn't think that was the right decision because he didn't want the possibility of maybe hurting me in the future but I said it's on me, not him.Then these two weeks have passed and honestly, we've barely spoken much at all. Texts seem so distant and kinda awkward, doing things together with our other friend there seemed fine until I realised we barely spoke to eachother there and when our friend had to step away for a minute, it would be silence. Then just recently, I asked him what was wrong because I saw somethfew days ago, I've been seeing some things from him saying he's not really too good, but he just said "I'm fine. I don't wanna talk about it." Then just a couple days ago I see things from him saying how he's so depressed and upset and I can feel it through messages and literally hear it in his voice. I want to ask and check in, but I don't think he'd tell me, and I don't want to be pushy because it seems like he doesn't want to speak to me very much anymore. I just wish I knew why he was so depressed suddenly, and why he doesn't feel like being talkative with me or anything. I hate it, it hurts so much because he's been my best friend since forever and I don't want to lose him, I love him. I just miss how things used to be and I really wish I could just know what was going on in his mind, what he feels and what's going on, what he wants but that's not possible.