Being someone who never did any substances, I tried the first cigarette today. It wasn't out of peer pressure. I was alone. Hurting. Feeling helpless. I am not sure what I was feeling but whatever it was, I wanted it to stop and I thought maybe a cigarette could do it. People make it sound like something that relieves the pain. It didn't. It didn't do anything for me. I don't regret. I don't care. Not about anything. I ended up hurting myself to turn the emotional pain into physical pain. Now I have bruises that I need to hide.