I always search for love in all the wrong places, it’s like a I sabotage myself, I always fall in love for guys who doesn’t feel the same way about me or aren’t good for me, and somehow I convinced myself that I can change them, and it’s really hard because i have so much love to give and I want to be loved, I feel so lonely, sometimes i think I’m ugly, and that nobody will love me the way I want.
2 months ago
Re: The pursuit of unhappiness
"I convinced myself that I can change them" Yep, your definetly XX chromosomed...One of those X chomosome's gaurantees this statement is undeniably true, being a female trait established in the DNA... SO... ya get it honestly..LOL..And whats this ugly business? (BITE that tongue girl)...Listen to this, Ya know what Ive found to be the truth about "ugly"? Its a word that comes from judgING / a judgeMENT which forms the opinions of others right?.. Ok , "pretty" / "beautiful" comes from the same so really, I think we ALL fit somewhere in the middle, and honesty, who's "opinion" is so high and mighty / all knowing, that would give them the pwr to determine WHO fits WHERE concerning this VERY subjective, everchanging personal POV? I heard a term used the other day on a sitcom that really proves this point. A young lady was complaining about her EARS, BOOBS, ELBOWS, KNEES, NOSE, EYE BROWS, BUTT,FEETSES, (the list conts..LOL) and her newly acquired BF says" Well ya know girl, with all those curves and bumps, your perfectly IMPERFECT to me...Wasnt that sweet? Ive also found that personality/ positive VIBE givin off plays a much larger role when determining someones "attractiveness"...During my HEAVY drinkin yrs , which ended back in the 90s, EVERY woman I dated tried to "fix" change me as well and it was ALL THEIR FAULT WE FAILED.. WAAAAA!!!! (just teasin..LOL.. :) being Fa see shus, BUT, I think IMO, ALOT of failed relationships share in BOTH sexes engaging in this "trait"....I think nowdays, speshelly w/ covid ruling our lives , loneliness has become practically the "standard" and we gotta be willing to drop the idea of finding a custom fit... in an "off the rack" world when it comes to finding a partner to love /nurture. I know its made me more of an extrovert when it comes to creating more "chance meetings" when hangin out at the parks/forests, approaching girls Id normally be backward to speak to...I think we gotta think outside the box nowdays and step up our game a bit here in the 21st if we're gonna find that person, w/ common insterests, who will "come to be" that person , loving us the way we want..What say you?