Look it sounds like you are determined and nothing can swade you from your plan. Thinking this, I'd like to tell you some of my story: I truthfully don't want to get into my past because that is no longer who I am. I can say I relate personally to your story.. What is important is that my life started when I was 18. I can't tell what age you are but once you're 18 you have legal freedom to cut anyone out of your life who don't treat you like you respectfully feel you need to be treated. I had a really hard life. I say "had" because when I turned 18 I changed my life for the better. I had saved up every dollar my grandmother gave me in the birthday cards since the age of eight or nine. It wasn't much but it paid for a beat up hunk of junk car and three tanks of gas. I got in my car and I just drove. I remember how many tanks because I didn't stop driving until I was out of money. That's how I knew I was far enough from my father's abusive house. I was homeless for a couple years and lived in that car. I did find a job however. So I was able to buy sleeping bags to survive the winter and make my car comfier. I signed up for a 24hr gym so I could shower, brush my teeth, and use the restroom when I wasn't at work. I saved up a good bit of money living in my car. I quit my job and drove further away. I even changed my name in 2017. Now I'm living in an apartment with a roommate, I've got a new reliable car, and my family can't find me. I am so incredibly happy to have been able to erase my past and create a new future for myself. I won't lie, it was very difficult, I came close to no longer being on this earth but I had to prove it to myself I was better than what I thought was going to be my future. You and I have similar stories, I'm really sorry about that. But there's many choices you can make to turn things around..And I want you to know, dear anonymous stranger, I will never forget this post or you. I'm sorry you were dealt this unloving/unaccepting family and I hope your next life you are either born in the right body or born into a family who's loving and open to all perceptions you see yourself as. I also can't help but wish you'd reconsider..