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This is just another shitty message

I just feel like there´s nothing left for me to do.

Been battling with the idea of killing myself since i was 14. I´m 21 now and i can´t find reasons not to do it. The only thing that keeps me up is that i know that i will make everyone close unhappy if i die. But i feel like that´s no life. I can´t find anything to live for. I´m not a good person, not a good professional, depression is hard to handle to me and i can´t keep up the good work if my head screams that i can´t do this anymore. Maybe if i was more intelligent i could overcome it. But i´ve tried enough and i can´t get out of this. I´m tired of trying. I don´t feel passion anymore. I just want to go. Please let me go.

I feel like i could make more of a positive change in the world if i died. I mean. i could donate my money, and i feel like it´s less probable that some corrupt person would take it if it comes from a dead person. I could write messages to the people that i admire, and maybe they would notice me if they know im dead.

Maybe i could even help my friends and family giving them my stuff. Maybe the oportunities that i got that don´t even make me happy anymore would end up being taken by someone who´s life would improve.

I´m just a sick person. I really getting less and less reasons to stay here anyway. Please, please i beg to anyone reading this. Give me the strength to end me because i cant find any reason to continue. I just wanna go. I want to start over. Or not, if there´s nothing else on the other side. Just give my chances to anyone else.

Anyone deserves them more than i do. Please, please, just tell me it´s okay. Tell me i dont have to fight with these feelings anymore. I can´t find reasons to do it anymore. I´ve attached myself to my ambition, but even that does not give me strength to live.

I can´t even get myself to connect with my friends and family anymore. I keep dissociating, i find talking to them very grey. And i see them happy and it breaks my heart that i can´t even pretend to be connected anymore. I´ve been avoiding my boyfriend because i feel like i can´t keep up with conversations anymore. I´ve been taking my pills but that does not do the trick...

I get annoyed at people sometimes, and i don´t want to generate more bad emotions in the world.

I don´t know if i can´t do this, actually. Because i can stay as the zombie i am everyday.

But i do know i don´t want to do this. I´m tired. I´m sick of it. I just wanna go.

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Re: This is just another shitty message

Hi I personally don’t know you but trust the universe... I used to be very depressed I literally used to think depression couldn’t be cured, I cut myself, isolated myself, thought about suicide, everything, but one day everything changed, I thought to myself long and hard and I started taking small steps to increase my vibration, and now I’m headed down a path of self realization, of self love, of new beginnings, so please just trust that this is what the universe wants you to go through so you can reach the destination that completes you