We were friends. I knew you as a kid. We grew up together. We were in the same circle of friends but we don't acknowledge each other that much. Maybe because I was busy being with Warren and you were busy being a boy. You were aloof I remembered. I remember you sitting in the corner with us and you would just wear your headphones on so nobody would dare talk to you. When we were in highschool Warren became my boyfriend and you were still there, quiet, and you didn't care. You don't care what's going on with the world. When our circle of friends became small to just you Warren and me I began noticing you. You always have a sandwich during breaks. Still wearing headphones but you began to talk. I still remember the first time you talked to me and asked me what flavor of juice I want. It was awkward and I couldn't answer you so you gave me an orange juice. And I hate orange juice... but I don't know why I drank it anyway. Warren and I broke up since what we felt was nothing serious and we're not really in love but we still agreed to be friends. He started dating someone after and you were so furious about it. You and Warren fought and that was the first time I saw you so angry. I confronted you about it. You said you hated that Warren can replace me easily and I'm your friend so you cared for me. I was moved. It was the first time you ever said that alright. We became close after that. I started watching all your games. Started cheering for you. We started going out as friends. You always drive me home. And for those little moments, my heart became so happy. You became my best friend. We were always together. Amid everything, I felt something unfamiliar but I didn't know what it was. Warren, me, and you would always hang out. It was all so lovely. Then Mindy came. She instantly became close to me. She was kind and almost too good to be true. She started hanging out with us. That was when everything changed. When I say everything, I meant everything. You changed. You became so talkative when she came. I never heard you talk that much. I never saw you laugh like that. I never thought you would care that much... but you cared...for her...more than how you cared for me. And I changed. My feelings changed. I began realizing what I felt. I was In love with you. Yes, I'm in love with you...And at that moment I realized that everything about my friendship with you changed. I started ignoring you. I was afraid, alright? I was In love with you and you like my friend. Where would these feelings put me? I don't want anything to break me. So I ignored everything that I felt. But I didn't know things could be hard for me. Every time I see you look at her like she's the most beautiful person in the world. I can see that you fancy her that much. It was hard, alright. But she's my friend. And you, are my friend too. Do you remember that time when we had a game, both Mindy and I? It was during the Athletic games in our school. We had a small accident. Mindy had bruises on her knees and I injured my hand. I remembered you came to the clinic. Mindy and I were chatting and laughing. You came to her and grabbed her. I never saw you cry until that day you were so angry and worried that you grabbed her so tight. You will never know how it felt watching you in front of me. I started cursing you and distanced her from you because you were hurting her. I started punching your chest and calling you an asshole.But then...I didn't know if I did that because you hurt my friend or because you hurt me. I never cried my entire life that day. I cried in my sleep until morning. I didn't know it would hurt that much. And I'm sorry because how I wish it was me you were holding. This is my letter of confession to you. That I'm in love with you. And I'm sorry that we can't be friends anymore. Because I knew in myself that I want more than that and I felt guilty. I felt guilty for not being happy for the both of you. I felt guilty because no matter how hard I try not to feel sad, I can't. I'm sorry I can't tell you this in person. I'm miles away from you and I don't know when will I ever have courage to tell you this. I'm hoping that after this I could move on. It's been a year and I think I owe my self the happiness that I deserve too. And please tell Mindy that I missed her so much.