Tonight was...

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Tonight I got so far as to actually write a suicide note to my parents. Asking them to love me enough to let me go. To remember that they couldn't have done anything better or different tom change things. I planned on packing up my whole room to make things easier and less painful for everyone. I have never gotten this close. Things have never been this bad and to be honest if it wasn't for the thought that I would have to write a letter to my youngest brother explaining to him that even though his "Annie" loved him more than anything in this world she couldn't stay. It was that that made me snap. I couldn't write any further. I couldn't imagine his little body curled up in my empty bed because I was no longer there to sleep next to in the mornings. I couldn't imagine not being there for his first day of school or his first match. I know it's getting worse but how can I ask for help when nothing is suppose to be wrong. Tonight was the night my little brother and the thought of him going through life wondering what happend to me saved me

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