i, uh, i relapsed. and now all i want to do is see myself bleeding. i'm such a horrible human being, and i deserve to be punished for it, right? so punishing myself is the best way to go about this, right? yeah...
i just wonder, what if someday this kills me, and then what? my friends... would they care? none of them really seem to care, and i don't know what to do.
i like my best friend, and i'm just, i don't know, kind of jealous, it's not healthy, but i miss her so so much, she's in another country now, and i just want to talk to her. but i think my confessing screwed things up, and i don't know what to do now.
she's my best friend, even though it's hard to catch her awake, but i'm so scared we'll grow apart because she moved.