2 months ago
Time Spent- 4m
7 Visitors

Um...my thoughts

I have depression but my mom doesn't believe, so I dont have anyone to talk, my mom doesn't really believe in depression

It started when I was in about 4th grade (8-9 years old) I have a big nose, and because of that I'd get teased alot, once I moved seats to sit beside my friend and went to lunch when i came back, I couldn't find my bag, cause they threw it in the bin, they said they didnt want me in their seat, my friend did nothing to help me

In fifth grade, I found out I liked the same gender and had some pics of girls kissing in my phone, they told the teacher, and she embarrassed me and my friend (who also had them).

Someone found my diary with all my depression thoughts and suicide letters, and gave the teacher, she called my mom and talked to her, my mom did nothing, as soon as we got home ahe just sent me to my room and never spoke of it again

I used to bring razors to school but never got the courage to do anything

When I was 11 I swallowed about 43 pills (they were low dose, so it didnt send me to the hospital)

I cut for the first time a few weeks ago, and I'm scared I might do worse, before i use to bore my ears to stop myself but after 4 piercings I'm scared to do more

My mom doesn't help me at all, she curses at me alot, and always tells me and my sister that were the reason she and my stepdad fights, she calls me a selfish demon most time and a bitch and tells me I'm gonna end up on the street with a man banging my head against a wall

I'm scared to have kids because I dont want to lose my temper on them

I just turned 13 in August