I winded up developing deep feelings for a former manager who happens to be in a long distance relationship with his gf. When we first met it was sooo rocky. The tension between us was pretty strong. I was certain he HATED MY GUTS! And I definitely hated him. He was mean and insensitive to me. Never said “thank you”, never greeted me with a “good morning” or “hi”. Nothing! Just peer asshole. One time, while we were working together, as oppose to asking me in person, he texted me and asked if he could work one of my shifts because he was off that day. Another time, I was assisting him while it was busy at our store and he told me so rudely to “move, move, move”. I got upset and told him off, he remained quiet and stopped being THAT mean to me. Ugh! I use to worry about him hating me so much, unaware that I actually liked him. Anyway, I went on vacation with some friends and once I came back his behavior towards me was vastly different. He was awfully nice to me. I use to tell myself he’s just doing his job. Always helpful, always greeting me, always appreciating the work I’ve done. He even offered me his coat one time when I was I a cold location. One time I took the initiative to say ‘hello’ to him, because he was always the one initiating a greeting. I did one day, and he appeared happy to hear me say “hello” to him. His tone told me that he was waiting on me to say something. I could remember still thinking he hated me until I would catch him staring at me ALL the time, watching me, listening in on my conversations, he knew my schedule better than me. The way he looked at me was.....I don’t know how to describe it. There was a look in his eyes that told a different tale than his rude behavior. His eyes were so soft and big when he looked at me. I immediately sensed that this wasn’t hate. But I downplayed it, and assumed again he hated my very existence. One time our work had an outing for all of us to hang out. That night, went ok until it was time for us to bowl. We were on separate teams. One of his teammates (our other coworker) was making fun of us. I responded with “dude leave us alone”. He then took the message board and wrote on the message board thing ‘stfu’. That hurt me because I was cognizant of my feelings for him. That hurt. As the night went on, I remember feeling him staring at me. He would look at me because in the corner of my eye I saw it. My intuition told me it was hate. So I believed it was hate. When I had questions about bowling (I’m not the most knowledgeable in bowling) he would bud in and answer the questions I had for my friends...before they could even respond. I would turn to look at him and I saw that look in his eyes. It was a sparkle, a softness, his eyes were big again. I felt the intensity. It was as if I was some sort of delicate thing. Idk how to explain it. So I turned away. That night I went home and cried because I felt he really hated me. That next week, I found out he was moving away. I was one of the few, who didn’t know. It blindsided me. He never once told me he was leaving. That really hurt. I wondered why he hated me so much to not tell me he was moving away. I felt embarrassed because I somehow had to pretend like I knew. He was distant with me that day. I greeted him and he didn’t greet me like he usually did. It was weird. I felt the tension with me. He would talk over me, and even talked about his gf whom he NEVER TALKED ABOUT around me until his last day. I assumed my feelings were confirmed. He wasn’t interested in me like I was him. I got off before him and he didn’t even say goodbye. He said goodbye to another co-worker, but not me. That hurt. I sat in the break room to clock out and a weird feeling came over me to say goodbye. I resisted at first, because I didn’t want to do it. He hates me, what’s the point. The weird feeling wouldn’t leave me alone. I was aware of my feelings so I assumed it was just how I felt. So, I got up the courage to say goodbye to him while he was busy taking an order. He removed his headset to hear what I had to say. He thanked me. I could tell he appreciated it. And I turned around and walked away.