I often get the things I wanted, but I am not a spoiled brat. I only ask for things that I need, the wants I buy them myself.I recently got a Macbook Pro, coming from a phone, I was expecting myself to be really happy for days. But that lasted less than a day. It felt immaterial to me.The reason I asked my parents for a laptop is because I was struggling with using my phone for online classes. It also take so much time charging hence making me having to wait for almost 8 hours. I've been studying in private school all my life (we ain't rich parents just want me to have the best education), until this pandemic.I was supposed to stop studying this year, but my mother convinced me to just temporarily enroll in a public school. I agreed, but somehow I hated this. The quality of education is mediocre. The teachers barely teach, yet give so much work to do. We don’t do classes on zoom or google meet, instead it is on facebook messenger. It was just chats. We are basically waking up early for attendance not education. It is lucky enough for us when the teacher sends a youtube video. For 4 weeks, I was doing fine. I passed all the requirements and all that. It started on the 5th week. I no longer care. It's not like I am being ungrateful, I wanted to do the school works but my mind and body won’t cooperate. Yesterday I helped my parents with our business for 5 dollars. I was barely eating the amount my body needed because we had to save money because income is running low. My head was hurting and so is my back because the money bag is with me (I am the cashier). I didn't say anything. But when we reached home I was exhausted. I ate till I can't washed up and slept. I was crying secretly on how I was literally hurting for 5 dollars. I had to buy myself the toiletries I needed especially my facial wash since my skin can’t handle bar soaps. It is hell, absolute hell. I was crying every night for 2 weeks now. I hate this. Even before the pandemic I was already feeling depressed, but it was manageable, till this pandemic... I guess I'll just..

I often get the things I wanted, but I am not a spoiled brat. I only ask for things that I need, the wants I buy them myself.I recently got a Macbook Pro, coming from a phone, I was expecting myself to be really happy for days. But that lasted less than a day. It felt immaterial to me.The reason I asked my parents for a laptop is because I was struggling with using my phone for online classes. It also take so much time charging hence making me having to wait for almost 8 hours. I've been studying in private school all my life (we ain't rich parents just want me to have the best education), until this pandemic.I was supposed to stop studying this year, but my mother convinced me to just temporarily enroll in a public school. I agreed, but somehow I hated this. The quality of education is mediocre. The teachers barely teach, yet give so much work to do. We don’t do classes on zoom or google meet, instead it is on facebook messenger. It was just chats. We are basically waking up early for attendance not education. It is lucky enough for us when the teacher sends a youtube video. For 4 weeks, I was doing fine. I passed all the requirements and all that. It started on the 5th week. I no longer care. It's not like I am being ungrateful, I wanted to do the school works but my mind and body won’t cooperate. Yesterday I helped my parents with our business for 5 dollars. I was barely eating the amount my body needed because we had to save money because income is running low. My head was hurting and so is my back because the money bag is with me (I am the cashier). I didn't say anything. But when we reached home I was exhausted. I ate till I can't washed up and slept. I was crying secretly on how I was literally hurting for 5 dollars. I had to buy myself the toiletries I needed especially my facial wash since my skin can’t handle bar soaps. It is hell, absolute hell. I was crying every night for 2 weeks now. I hate this. Even before the pandemic I was already feeling depressed, but it was manageable, till this pandemic... I guess I'll just..